Redefining New Year’s Resolutions

 

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Our biology doesn’t recognize the season. Our body doesn’t know the difference between Valentines Day, Halloween or New Year’s Day

People’s desire to start fresh or to draw a line in the sand and step over the old and into the new has been around a long time. There’s nothing wrong with the desire to say this is my last year of illness, or I’m going to do whatever I value even better (my sport, school, job, art, passion). However,  if it’s unrealistic, too much too soon, or tied to an increased level of stress then it’s an invitation not to make the mark and to continue to chisel away at our self-esteem.

That’s often the case! We put unnecessary pressure, not only on ourselves but our body by shocking it into massive change.

Let’s pause and reflect instead. 

CHANGE is a Process

Sometimes our New Year’s resolutions seem as ridiculous as tucking in a newborn baby on December 31st and asking the baby to walk when they wake up the next morning, despite their inability to even hold their head up independently, sit, or crawl. We would never put such an impossible task on someone we love. So why then would we do it to ourselves? It’s because we aren’t gentle enough with ourselves. We put too much pressure on ourselves. We don’t treat ourselves with enough compassion. In fact, sometimes we are just downright mean to ourselves.

Perhaps on December 31st we could whisper softly to ourselves, much like to the new baby: “I can’t wait to watch you change and grow stronger over the next year. To witness your courage as you slowly stand back up, careful to regain your balance when you fall. I’ll be right here, ready to hold your hand.”

Let’s create awareness of how our goals are making us feel, I urge you  to join me as I flip my approach. This coming year, let’s begin a new ritual to redefine our resolutions by getting clear about how we wanted to feel, instead of what we could accomplish.

I will consider the following in making my New Year’s resolutions in order to improve my self-esteem, instead of tearing it down:

  • Set realistic goals.
  • Make my resolutions gradual and sustainable. Small changes rather than unsustainable drastic changes.
  • Remember that change is a process. Make it attainable, which is by far more helpful.
  • Slow down! Make room for subtle shifts which increase my chances of success.
  • Be careful not to add more angst than relief.

Let’s welcome the coming year 2017 with a redefined and fresher outlook! 🙂

(c) 2016 viewpointsofandrei.com

Are you Perfect?

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Perfect people have scars on their faces and perfect complexions. Perfect people have long brown hair at 60 and short grey hair at 35. Perfect people wear wigs. Perfect people have sex with men, women, both, or no one at all. Perfect people can barely see over the grocery store counter, and sometimes bump their heads at the top of doorways. Perfect people have waistlines that are infinite in size and geometry. Perfect people have skin tones as light as vanilla ice-cream and as rich dark chocolate. Perfect people come from every corner of this beautiful planet and can be seen everywhere – even in the mirror. Yeah! That’s right! Perfect is the way we are born. Perfect  is the way we are now. Perfect is exclusively unique.

We are all perfect just the way we are!

So, be yourself. Trying to be anyone else is a waste of the person you are. Embrace that individual inside you that has ideas, strengths and beauty like no one else. Be the person you know yourself to be — the best version of you — on your terms. And above all, be true to YOU — if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it.

(c) 2016 viewpointsofandrei.com