Leave or Love your Comfort Zone?

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We sit in our comfort zones every day … pretending that they’re there to support us.

When you strip everything back and bring it down to the bare bones, life is really just a ‘game’ that we play every day. Well, basically it is. Our lives pass us by and we have no idea. We continue to do the same things, day after day, while in a dark, hidden corner of our minds we secretly hope that things will change.

We tell ourselves (and others!) all sorts of stories about the things we are going to do – when we get a minute to ourselves – and then we go about our day adding as much ‘stuff’ to it as we can so that there is no time to think about the things we really want. It’s easier – and less traumatic – that way.

Why is it that as adults we complicate our lives to the extent that we just ‘have to get away’ or just ‘have to take a break’ for us to survive? It’s almost as if we’ve convinced ourselves that if we just get away we can recover enough to step back into our ‘normal’ life. We don’t ever stop to question where our lives are at, or why we’re so unhappy or under so much stress that we have to take a break before we collapse.

We simply, blindly accept that this is our lot in life – it’s what we do because ‘life wasn’t meant to be easy’.

We’ve been fed the message that ‘someone out there is worse off than we are so we should be grateful’ and we turn this into the reason why where we’re at is OK. The reality is that we’re slowly killing ourselves or, if we’re lucky, pointing ourselves directly onto a collision course with chaos … simply because we don’t stop to recognize that there is another way. We accept less than we’re comfortable with because it’s the polite thing to do.

Most of us are programmed to exist rather than live our lives, and we find ourselves referring to our existence as our ‘comfort zone’. We spend our lives with our heads down, thoroughly enmeshed in the ‘stuff’ we’ve got going on. We very rarely raise our heads and look around for the possibility that life might have so much more to offer us.

We’re entrenched in playing our game, but most of us don’t even realize that we are the ones who make the game. Our social conditioning, and how we receive and internalize the messages we’re given, will determine how we set up the rules of our game. For most of us, our game is set up with harsh and critical rules and the game is made so complex that it is almost always impossible for us to win. Why, exactly, do we do this to ourselves?

We’re totally oblivious to the fact that, in reality, we have the power to obliterate the game by simply making the choice not to play any more, or to change the rules, or to change the purpose of the game, or even to start playing a completely different game altogether. Our challenge is to stop and realize that our comfort zone – our game – is usually set up in a way that is at odds with what we want from our life.

A lot of people will tell you that to get out of your comfort zone you have to make uncomfortable choices. It’s often said that you should ‘do something uncomfortable every day to help you eliminate your fears, and to experience rapid growth in your life’.

What if they’re wrong?

Why should we add more struggle to an already complex day? Most of us have had more than enough struggles in our lives without adding any more.

If you don’t want your comfort zone to kill you, take a step back and acknowledge that your ‘comfort zone’ isn’t actually all that comfortable. In fact, looking at it with honest and open eyes, it’s full of things you aren’t comfortable with: the daily grind, toxic relationships, jobs you hate, situations that clash with your values … and the list goes on and on. Then, take action from that realization. Take measurable steps towards the changes you really wanted to achieve in life.

Courage and discipline are words that are bandied around as being the source of great achievements. When we break our ‘stuff’ down into small chunks that we can tackle one step at a time, then it’s much easier for us to set our priorities and take small steps to achieving our outcomes. When we approach things in a simple way and have small, easily achievable tasks, then courage and discipline aren’t required anywhere near as often.

Life becomes simple, and more importantly, life becomes about simple steps that make us happy.

 

7 thoughts on “Leave or Love your Comfort Zone?

  1. Another Super BEAUTIFUL post. So motivating !
    How do you write so good ?
    I mean you inspire me so much !
    I would want to know more about you and would love to be surrounded by people like you who uplift people even in this cruel cruel world. Much love Dear Andrei ♡

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I guess I’ve been trained good by my job, haha, added a bit probably by philosophical depth from years of making biblical lessons to share with my congregation 🙂 (haha, am I sounding old and wisdom-filled? But I’m still not) Truth be told, I consider it a blessing from God as I didn’t have the opportunity to a formal training.
      Many bloggers (just in WP alone) are extremely gifted with writing skills, in fact many have writing as their chosen fields or careers.
      But I always believed in my heart that we have in our possession 3 of the best things that we can share to the world that will not cost us even a bit — our time, heart and ideas. We just have to find ways to deliver them; and to me, blogging is a great avenue for it.
      Surround yourself with people that can bring out the best in you. You are a prolific writer. You have it in you Taj.
      Continue thinking outside the box because conventions are very limiting.
      Own your blog and make it soar! I’ll be one of those who will be happy to bear witness to the successes of your blog as they unfold 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. That is true Andrei
        I didn’t have any experience in Writing before this. I haven’t ever written for a school magazine ! Absolutely nothing! But I make it a point that when I write blogs, I pour my heart out. Everything. And I guess That’s what people relate to. Thank you for the motivation ♡

        Liked by 1 person

  2. You come up with very thought provoking posts Andrei. Recently I read a quote, ” when was the last time you did something for the first time?”. If you are still thinking of an answer, it just shows that you haven’t stepped out of your comfort zone.
    To grow and better ourselves we need to experience the new and the unknown!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I absolutely agree with you on the fact that we need to experience the new and the unknown in order to grow and better ourselves. That growth connotes change. And, that life begins at the end of our comfort zone.

      The real challenge that beface most people today is this: “Most of us are programmed to exist rather than live our lives, and we find ourselves referring to our existence as our ‘comfort zone’”

      Yes. Staying in your comfort zone is just merely existing and not living. Metaphorically speaking – our comfort zone kills us. Undeniably still, that comfort zone (way of existing) is not after all that comfortable when we come to think of it. Hence, all the more that we should aspire to break free from it.

      However, in so doing, I believe we need not push ourselves to far to a point that getting out of it just adds more chaos and complexity to your already chaotic and complex life. That’s why stepping back to wisely consider “where you’re at” and “where you need to be” in life is very important. The transition from the inside going to the outside of your comfort zone need not be that super uncomfortable that it will just leave you tired and weary instead of happy and fulfilled because you so wanted that change yet no mindful consideration extended from your end.

      Same as all the other important things in life, leaving your comfort zone to courageously traverse the unknown, takes mindful consideration and simplicity in execution. Nobody should follow with absolute conformity the journey taken by anybody else towards breaking free from their comfort zones. It’s your game, play it your way.

      Thank you for reading Radhika 🙂
      Love the quote you shared 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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