#Angry???

Have you ever had one of those days when you’re holding a stick and everyone looks like piñata? The thing where you need to smack something to get it work and you wish you could do that with people too? Or, such a beautiful, harmless kid song is translated “Twinkle, twinkle little star, I want to hit you with a car; throw you off a tree so high, hope you break your neck and die?”

When you feel extremely angry, wouldn’t it be amazing to throw a juvenile temper tantrum without someone having you committed?

I admit, when I see a kid losing his marbles in the cereal aisle, I don’t cringe. I envy.

At a certain age you start holding back on the immediacy of your emotions, and who can blame you? These days, being too happy is considered naïve, being too sad is an automatic clinical diagnosis, and being too angry is a complete waste of energy.

You’ve heard it all. Suck it up. Let it go. Move on.

Anger isn’t worth it. Right?

Wrong.

Anger is one of the most important emotions you have. When you’re angry, it’s a red flag that something needs to change, and when you’re extremely angry, something needs to change right now.

Anger is an unbelievably powerful emotion. It has the power to shift not only the way we feel inside, but the way we see the world around us. It has the power to blur our vision of the world. Anger has the power to reshape us, if we let it.

I’m not generally an angry person. Emotional, yes, but angry? No, not so much. I find myself easily frustrated, but not angry. Not the full power of the tornado in your belly anger that gives you the power to rip down roofs and plow through oceans with your bare hands. True unadulterated anger.

I consider myself to be a rather nice person. However, once a nice person has to stick up for themselves watch out. They’re not only fighting the battle at hand but fighting so they don’t lose themselves and what they stand for. Against injustices, ill-manners from people, and all types of biases – everything they believed in to be just and true.

One time too many someone has directed an act of anger towards us. We often don’t know how to react and when we do, we react the wrong way. As the quote states, silence is the best way to handle any situation involving anger. It is the first step in solving a problem. This should be taken into consideration the next time we decide to engage in conflict.

We must learn how to deal with our emotions. There is a time and place for everything and we should act accordingly. Sometimes we feel anger pulls beneath the surface of our tolerance. It may be confusing and feel consuming and we have the sudden urge to lose our patience. We realize that our lack of self-control is never ending and it seems to control everything we do. Then we can’t seem to find composure again and we feel our walls are closing in, like we are running out of options. This is very confusing to any of us and that is why silence is best, to avoid any confusion, instead it will make things flow smoother.

Again, however, silence should not be held for long. It must have a life span, a very short one indeed, so to speak just to pacify the situation. We don’t have to stay silent for the rest of our lives after the raging storm has passed. It goes without saying that silence as a means of strategy has a limitation otherwise it falls into what we call the “silent treatment”.

If it’s anger, resentment or another strong negative feeling that you have, keeping silent doesn’t make that feeling dissipate. Just the opposite happens–the unspoken problem remains, distancing occurs and the relationship suffers as a result, given the involved is a significant friend or a close acquaintance or just a person you see everyday  but you don’t want to categorize.

At other times, you feel hurt, angry or upset by something another person says or does. Because letting them know how you feel makes you vulnerable, you decide to keep those feelings inside and withhold them from the other person. Invariably, the silent treatment is hurtful to everyone involved. Even so, many of us have a tendency to withdraw and withhold when we’re in emotional pain, especially from the person we perceive is causing it.

There will come a point in time that we need to speak up and let it all out. However, in the nicest way possible. A far better approach is to be willing and able to talk to them honestly about how you feel and why–without blame.

I’ve been angry and upset about so many things these pass days. Angry and upset especially at the rudeness and disrespect I observed from amongst significant friends and acquaintances, and also from most people around me. I empathize with the aggrieved. I am feeling the urge to stand up and fight for them. However, I came to realize that the thing is none of my business at all in the first place.

This was written after meditating, looking inside me and finding what my real take on the matter is. The real me talking.

Of course, I was also engaged in conflicts before and has acted contrary to the above-expressed personal views. It turned out to be Word War II equipped with all the nastiest word bombs and deadly maneuvers resulting to property damages and death of a pitiful potted plant. Nasty and embarrassing! 🙂

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